mind games

So the true question is....is the cat playing mind games on me, or am I playing mind games on the cat? Mama gets fed twice a day. First, when I get up in the morning, and then when I get home from work. The problem is that on the weekends, I am coming and going at all hours, and my schedule does not fit the framework of when she is usually fed. (7am/7pm) So, the weekend has become a time of power struggles and negotiation. I come home, she makes a run for the kitchen, I go sit down and watch TV. (Beth 1/Mama 0) It's the middle of the night, I am dead asleep, Mama launches herself at my head, and begins the five hour quest to get me out of bed. (Mama 1/Beth 0) It worries me that the cat seems to be getting smarter. It has gotten now that she can walk all over my head, heck, she can dance a jig...and I don't necessarily even wake up...but she has pulled out the big guns. She has begun to lick my face. This really grosses me out for several reasons. First, at some point every day, I see the cat licking herself in a place that nicely reared Methodists don't speak about in mixed company. Secondly, she has breath of death. However, the little darling has figured out that licking me wakes me up and gets me moving. Hmmmm. I thought I might stop cleaning her box in retaliation, but somehow we all seem to lose with that plan. I am just worried that she is becoming bolder by the moment, and is hatching some evil plan to take domination of the apartment. Example: tonight, I was eating dinner in my big overstuffed ugly chair, and she was sitting behind my head at the top. Suddenly, she starts nibbling/licking my ear, I react, and she runs down my body (shoulder, b**b, tummy) and makes a grab at my plate. Seriously. After I had evicted her from the chair, I'll be damned if she didn't jump back onto the top of the chair facing the other way. She is wily, and I now consider her a worthy opponent. Do most people have these kind of problems with there seven pound cat? More later...must go and strategize.